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Lisa's Substitute
The Simpsons Season 02 Episode 19
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS
Lisa is pretty smart for her age, no doubt, but it's still remarkable that she surmises that Mrs. Hoover has been dumped and that's why she'll need a substitute teacher. How the hell did she know that Texas didn't become a state until 1845? Isolated facts are not markers of intelligence, right? Right. I'll keep telling myself that. The revolver? Come on, Lisa Simpson knows when the revolver was invented? Not likely.
"For the record there were a few Jewish cowboys ladies and gentlemen: guys who were great shots and spent money freely." I think I love this guy, too.
Up yours, Martin, naysaying Ray Bradbury! Who do you think you are, anyway?
They're eating pemmican! I just got some pemmican recently. I can't say I've acquired the taste for it quite yet.
Why did Sherri and Terri nominate Bart for the presidency? I thought they hated him.
One thing I don't understand is Lisa's reticence to play in front of her classmates. She doesn't seem to have any issues showboating during band practice (see every single opening sequence of the show), but all of a sudden, cat's got her tongue?
I love the iconic shot from The Graduate, it's clear the part was written for Dustin Hoffman from the start.
Lisa's insistence that her love of Mr. Bergstrom is qualitatively different than Marge's love for Homer is a little grating. I'm glad Marge puts an end to that.
Bart is such a good politician. A vote for Bart is a vote for anarchy! I'd vote for that kid.
I love it when Homer has conversations with his brain. He's really much more self-aware than he lets on. His balking at paying the suggested donation at the museum is sort of a dick move, though. Why does he have to make a big stink of it? Jerk.
I'm with Homer. I would also rather have a mummy chasing after me than the wolf-man. I'm pretty sure I can take a 3000-year-old dead inbred pharaoh any day.
"Can I dye my shoes pink?" I don't understand this request. Mrs. Waldorf assures me this is a thing. I don't believe it.
Lisa's wearing a bow. She looks really different. She does look cute, though.
Mrs. Hoover's psychosomatic Lyme disease has gone into remission. I'm glad for her. I love the cynical teachers at this school. I was getting a little bit tired of the guy who actually cared about kids. Ah, American public schooling, you never fail to fail.
I can't believe not a single one of Bart's camp voted. I mean, it's funny and all, plus Martin gets the great photo in the school paper a la Dewey defeats Truman.
"That's the problem with being middle-class. Anybody who really cares will leave you for somebody who needs it more." So poignant. But man, Lisa needs to stop being all maudlin about it.
This paragraph has been redacted because I took Homer's side and Mrs. Waldorf yelled at me. Ugh.
This is the first time I saw Lisa's End Apartheid Now poster. She also has a no-nukes sticker on her mirror. Also, she's eight years old. Eight.
Homer's a better dad than I'd be. That's pretty sad, right? Who is this Louis that Bart is talking about? I don't think we really hear much about this kid again.
CONCLUSION
I like this episode a lot. The Simpsons seems to be one of the few shows that manages to have really good cameo episodes that don't seem like a gimmick (this is almost certainly a by-product of being animated, but still). Nonetheless, in a season with so many classics, I can't really give this one the full five donuts. But it is a near-classic.
THIS EPISODE'S RATINGS
 5/5 donuts from Mrs. Waldorf
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RATINGS LEGEND
= LAME
= BAD
= MEH
= GOOD
= CLASSIC
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PLOT SUMMARY FROM WIKIPEDIA
Lisa's teacher, Miss Hoover, thinks she has come down with Lyme disease and is replaced by substitute teacher Mr. Bergstrom. Because of his unorthodox teaching methods, Lisa takes a friendly, even romantic, liking to him. Bart's class, meanwhile, prepares to elect a class president. Mrs. Krabappel nominates Martin, while Sherri and Terri nominate Bart. During a debate with Martin, Bart tells jokes and wins the class's support.
Lisa runs into Mr. Bergstrom at a museum and is embarrassed when Homer displays his ignorance. Sensing that Lisa is missing something in her relationship with her father, Mr. Bergstrom takes Homer aside to suggest he be a more positive role model. At school on Monday, Lisa is shattered to find Miss Hoover is back and Mr. Bergstrom is gone. Rushing to the train station, Lisa confesses to Mr. Bergstrom that she will be lost without him. To comfort her, he writes her a note and tells her that if she ever feels alone and like she can't rely on anybody, its contents are all she needs to know. He then boards the train and departs. It reads, "You are Lisa Simpson." Certain of Bart's inevitable victory, none of the children in his class vote for him, so Martin is announced as the class president.
Devastated by Mr. Bergstrom's departure, Lisa takes her grief out on Homer, calling him a baboon. Marge tells Homer to console Lisa, explaining how her daughter is very hurt emotionally and is in need of her father. Homer enters Lisa's room and finds her crying over her desk. He is uncertain of how to deal with Lisa's sadness, and is uncomfortable seeing his daughter crying. Homer explains to Lisa how he cannot really understand how it feels to lose someone important: everyone he has ever loved and cared about lives with him still. He then alludes to Lisa calling him a baboon, and in a loving manner mimics a monkey and Lisa is cheered up. Lisa apologizes to Homer for calling him a baboon, and Homer accepts the apology. Finding Bart still seething over the election result, Homer cheers him up by reminding him that all the job of class president would have really meant was a lot of extra work with little reward. Finally going by Maggie's room, he places her pacifier in her mouth. Proud that he helped all three of his children, Homer goes to bed with Marge happily that night, stating he is "on the biggest roll" of his life.
Accessed from Wikipedia on Mar. 13, 2010